INFP

Do parties and crowds fill you with energy, or send you scurrying for peace and quiet?

This was the introductory question for the latest Daily Prompt from WordPress. I have benefited from these prompts, turning several of them into posts. This is another one that I enjoyed. The introspective side of me can’t keep from a little self-reflection from time to time.

My answer is a bit of a convoluted one. I have developed pretty good people skills, I think. But I also require lots of time for reflection. Activities that are enjoyed alone, such as reading, writing, and listening to music, are the things I enjoy most. In social situations, I can usually be found talking to one or two people in the corner of the room.

I found a website with a personality questionaire and filled it out today. I think the results are right on the mark for me. I would be interested  to hear if those who know me best agree. And I would also be interested to hear your results from the test.

Here is the page for the INFP personality. http://www.16personalities.com/infp-personality

And here is the page to take the quiz. http://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

 

 

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Third Person Perspective

This is a WordPress writing prompt idea. The challenge is to list at least six things that are unique, exciting, odd, etcetra. A few of these are things I’ve written or talked about on this blog. Feel free to ask or comment about anything that piques your interest, or you want to hear more about. I’ll probably add/take away from the list as I think of more interesting ideas. Here goes.

1) I am a published author.

2) I have Spina Bifida.

3) I am named after my father and grandfather.

4) A few of my closest friends have given me the nickname “Niles” because of my resemblance to David Hyde Pierce from “Fraser”.

5) Several of the students at the school where I work as a substitute call me Spiderman because of a resemblance to Tobey Maguire.

6) I am the only person in my immediate family who can grow a beard. My dad wore a mustache for a long time, though.

 

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Acceptance

I have written previously about the birth defect that I have: Spina Bifida. Because of this, I have always felt an uneasy sense of being an outsider. I have a lot of physical problems, but at the same time I am largely independent and lead a pretty active lifestyle. Many people are surprised to find out that I have Spina Bifida because as long as my braces are not visible, I seem to have no problems.

I didn’t have much of a problem with being self-conscious as a child because my parents taught me how to explain my disability in a way that my friends and classmates could understand. But as a teen I started learning more about Spina Bifida. As a result, I became more aware and self conscious, mostly, I think, because almost every teenager is worried about their image in the eyes of their peers.

This went on for a few years until I conducted my first sociological experiment. College gave me a good chance at a fresh start because I was a student at a new school and I only knew a few people. So, I decided I would start acting like I was comfortable with who I was and see how that affected people’s reactions to me. Something exciting and unexpected happened. The more I acted comfortable with myself, the more everyone around me became more comfortable interacting with me. This gave me more confidence and propelled the cycle forward.

I share all this because I learned some valuable lessons that have helped me enjoy my life, my family, and my friends. One of the most important is to be yourself and be nice to people and most people will be nice to you. But you won’t always be liked by everyone. That’s okay and very normal. Some people are just not going to get along. Hold on to those people who love you for who you are. They will enrich your life so much. Listen to them and pay no attention to people who don’t know the real you. Love others and allow yourself to receive the love of others.

My hope is that someone who reads this will find something to take away from my rambling that will help you learn to love yourself for who you are, and to accept and treasure the love of your family and friends. Lastly, I leave you with a very appropriate Dr. Seuss quote.

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Favorite Thing About Myself

By nature, I am quite critical of myself. I am aware of all of my faults before anyone else. I do not extend this criticism to others. I reserve it for myself. But there are a few things that I do well. I am blessed to be surrounded by family and friends who are extremely supportive. They agree with what follows.

One of my favorite things about myself is that I am a good listener. Since I was very young, my contemporaries have confided in me. Sometimes it’s because I let them know that I am willing to be a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen. But many times I think it was a matter of just being there when someone needed to talk through a situation. I don’t consider myself an especially wise person, so I hesitate to offer advice. In fact, I believe most of the time advice is not what is required. It is the simple act of quietly listening that is valuable at the right time. And I think something that goes hand in hand with being a good listener is the gift of perception. I can often sense what is behind or underneath the conversation, but is not actually voiced.

I think that I was a bit quieter when I was younger, which lends itself to being a good listener. As I have gotten older, I fear that I may be becoming more talkative. I don’t want to lose my ability to listen well, so this is something I am conscious of. I don’t want anything to cause people to feel like they can’t talk to me. I have always considered it an honor that people have shared things, big and small, with me. And I hope this continues.

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Memory

The subject of memory is fascinating to me. People have so many different methods and tactics to help them remember things they want to recall later. Some people have photographic memories. Others remember numbers and figures. Still others can recall names and faces easier than most. I belong to this last category. So many people over the years have thought it unsettling that I remember them, while they have no idea who I am. I suppose, in choosing academics as my career, that I shouldn’t be surprised by my interest in memory.

Another thing I have noticed is that I tend to remember everything: classmates from school, former coworkers, even insignificant events from childhood. One of my earliest memories is sitting in my driveway at about three years old watching my dad drive off for a trip around the block on his Harley Davidson Sprint. He seems to think that I shouldn’t have been old enough to remember his motorcycle running, but it’s there in my mind.

Maybe this is one of the reasons why I have such a hard time remembering driving directions. My mind is so full of everthing else, there isn’t room left for that. In any case, I’d love to hear your thoughts- earliest memory, the kinds of things you remember best, or have the hardest time remembering?

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Pen Pals

I’ve talked before about how much I love to write, and how much I enjoy sending/receiving mail. I started to act on this a few Christmases ago when I mailed a few Christmas cards. Since then my mailing list has grown, and I am very happy about that.

I was thinking that this year I would like to write occasional letters to friends, not just for birthdays or Christmas. So I wanted to see how interested some of you would be in getting mail from me and, when you have time, having someone to write. This will be open to anyone, no matter where you live. Just let me know and I’ll be glad to have new pen pals.

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2012 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The new Boeing 787 Dreamliner can carry about 250 passengers. This blog was viewed about 1,200 times in 2012. If it were a Dreamliner, it would take about 5 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

2012: The Year in Film

I am not a big moviegoer. I only see a handful of films a year, so I wasn’t going to write a post about my favorite films of the year. I couldn’t think of many to write about. Then I had one of the best movie experiences of the year this afternoon and found inspiration.

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I saw “Les Miserables”. The source material (the novel and the musical) are so well-done it makes you believe that art can’t get any better. Every emotion- every grand theme was in this film. Love and loss; death and life; pain and redemption. This is why I go to a movie. It is one of the few movies I have seen that the crowd applauded at the end. This was more than entertainment; this was art. A few film adaptations have come before this one (and I have not seen them), but I find it hard to think how any of them could top this one.

The second film that stood out to me this year is “Skyfall”, the latest James Bond movie. I’ve loved the books since I was a kid. Then I started watching the movies. None of them had the right feel to me of the character in the books. Bond on screen was mostly a ladies’ man with a quick wit and a smirk. Then came “Casino Royale” in 2006.

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Here was the Bond from the books: tough; unfeeling; smart; focused; but still a ladies man. This was the 007 who could outsmart you and kill you (with bare hands or a gun). My brother and I were talking one time about what film character we would be if we had the chance. I wouldn’t be a superhero. I would be James Bond. All the women love him. He has all the best things money can buy: clothes, watches, weapons, exotic places. What man would not want all this?

As for “Skyfall” itself, I love how overtly British it is. I love everything about British culture and history. And “Skyfall” proudly displays its Britishness to the benefit of the movie. And we get a little peek behind the curtain of Bond’s life and see a part of his childhood- a unique thing for a Bond movie.

These are two of my favorite films of 2012. What did you think of them? What others would you pick for your list?

2012 Books In Review

I didn’t read quite as many books this year as I have the past few years. The best new book I read this year was The Girl With Glass Feet by Ali Shaw. This was Shaw’s debut novel, and I read it on the recommendation of my friend, Jane. It is a wonderfully well-written love story/fairy tale/myth hybrid. I highly recommend this book, and Shaw is an author I will look forward to reading in the future.

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2012 also gave me a book quest of sorts. I read somewhere about a book titled Winter In Maine by Gerard Donovan. The book was published, as best I can tell, sometime between 2008-2009. The only copy I have found is in German, which I unfortunately cannot read. If anyone finds this book in English, I would love to know. Also, if any of my friends reads German and would like this book, email me and we’ll work something out. Meanwhile, I will continue my search.

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Honorable mention goes to Strong Is Your Hold by Galway Kinnell. This is a book of poetry that will be the next new book I read, whether it is 2012 or ’13. (I am reading two books right now, and I am a slow reader). This book is special to me because it was given to me as a gift by my dear friend, Tosha. I love poetry, but do not tend to read much of it. One of my reading goals for 2013 is to read more poetry.

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So, these are a few books that stood out to me over the last twelve months. Have you read anything good lately? Or this year?

Simple Pleasures

I enjoy my share of nice things: clothes, fragrances, high end wetshaving products, are a few examples. But I derive just as much, if not more, enjoyment from simple things. I thought it would be a fun idea to talk about a few of my favorite simple pleasures. These are by no means original, just the first things that came to mind.

A book- anybody who knows me knows I love to read. Books hold so much opportunity to learn and feel and experience something new through the words of the author.

A walk- I have to get outside, if only for a few moments, every day. Sometimes, because of allergies or weather, I can only stay for a very short time. But it’s worth it to get out into nature for a bit. It always helps to clear my head (figuratively speaking).

A smile- People look better wearing a smile. It’s a fact. And you can lift somebody else’s mood by doing it. So, just do it.

Sending/Receiving mail- Real mail. Pen and paper, envelope and a stamp. In this age of instant electronic communication, the fact that somebody takes the time to send something via the Post Office means even more.

“Unplugging”- It does me so much good to occasionally leave my computer and phone and be unavailable for a time.

Meeting people from all over the world- Even though technology annoys me in many ways, I do love how the internet connects people who would otherwise not have met. I would not have met several of my closest friends if not for this thing called the internet. (I know it’s a stretch to include this in a “simple” pleasures list. But this is my list đŸ™‚ )

A hug- a gift you can give and receive that the same time. And it has the power to help both people feel better. What’s not to love?

Hearing a loved one say “I love you”- Oh, the power of these words. Hearing them instantly makes me happy; improves a bad day or a bad mood. I resolve to say them more.

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Any thoughts about my list?

What would be on yours?